MONDAY ~ (without Jessica)

I Really didn't feel like going back to school but I make myself wake up, dress up and walk out of the house and by the time I know, I'm in school. Oh! I hate crowded bus. Hate it when people start pushing when they know there's no place. Hate it when I end up with nothing to hold on to and lost my blanche and keep banging here and there. Feeling stupid. Usually have bad mood in morning until people talk to me of cause? The whole day was actually boring...? Jessica is not in school due to some reason. I somehow like today because time pass quite fast. Hmm, there are times where i feel alone. I went to pe myself. Val went to sheryl, jessica is not here, ill feel extra if i act like nothing and follow cw,boh and sc. Thus, i went to pe myself even if its just for a short while i still feel alone.I wonder if I'm like smiling when smiling and really laughing when I'm laughing. It doesn't feel right. Am I making myself smile and laugh? Why do I feel so empty? Why am I feeling so down? Why am I making myself so down? I feel like I'm pretending. I only have ml,Suria,Carrisa that I won't feel extra at all but we are in different class. Zulikahhh ~~ if only you are here I think I wont feel so lonely. Maybe I'm just thinking too much like I always does. Okayyyyyyyyy gonna stop this shit. Hehe. ^^ yay!!!! Was home early today. At 2pm plus. Now I'm not sure if I should go cousin house to take things for not. But feel like bathing first of gonna go. I'll see how. Was think if should ask zuk out but Nahh got homework to finish. Hmmmmm. Okay bye.(I know it's random)